Sunday, 20 May 2012

Final Words.....

God bless you - You are amazing in His sight, never forget that!!! He created you in His image, and we all have a Purpose!!!

Hello my friends - I want to give you some background info, why I am writing as Youschka  (my name in 'real life' is Tanja)......Youschka was the name of endearment my father gave me - this and Youschel......it took me almost until forever to realize that he really loved me dearly......just didn't know how to show it to me in the right way, or maybe I should say in the way that I could understand.....he was a very authoritarian father figure - I remember, when I was little I was afraid, when I was driving in the car with him, that I wasn't interesting to him - I had nothing smart to say.........I started fidgeting, when we were just him and I (still doing it today, when I am faced with moments of insecurity - I can't make eye contact, when I am in that place) - thankfully Christ has changed that too - today there is very few moments of this in my life anymore, and I know, when Christ has finished His work in me, even these moments won't be there anymore, cause I will be all renewed in Him.

In the course I am taking to become a Somatic/Psycho Therapist, I learnt, that all these mechanisms helped my soul to stay alive, to not give out and die. This school is not biblical at all - but it's representing Christ in the most perfect sense possible, as it accepts and frees from bondage. Helps the Psyche to understand it's bodily mechanisms or body postures better. Through picking up any movement whatsoever, that can be observed by the Therapist (Here I want to give tribute to the most intuitive and gifted person in this realm, I ever met - my Biosynthesis Trainer Gabriele Hoppe - Gabi, you are an inspiration to me), with detotalization of the body into different members of the body and into their unconscious movements or tics......lies the possibility to find out, what other movement might help the client to get in contact with new mechanisms, that fulfil the same purpose, but are voluntary and can be reproduced, because all of the sudden there is meaning and purpose in everything you do......thus the person learns to connect more fully to his or her innate potential, with the Talents and Gifts, God packed into their being.

But back to my name for the blog and my father..... - and my Heavenly Father for that matter: I chose to write under this name, because I want to honour my earthly Father - yes, he has hurt the little girl inside, but thanks to Christ filling me with His Holy Spirit, has made me see clearer, that He was just as much in bondage and had His own mechanisms in tact, that had done the same to him: kept him alive until this day. 

The deeper meaning of this blog is to say: Thank you Papa, for the love you gave me, even though you didn't know how to show it, that I would understand it, I got glimpses in how much you loved me, through giving me these names of endearment, and for funding all therapies in this world, that I needed, to get in touch with this inner me, which is Christ, until I could grow up in Christ and now stand tall in my Faith and Trust in God, to heal me - Papa, had it not been for you, I don't think I would be where I am today - because of the tainted love you gave me, and my God given talent, to never ever give up Hope, I found the deepest treasure that is in this world, and this is the Agape Love, which is Christ. So I want to thank you from the bottom of the heart for all that you were - all that you are today (iniquities and all) - I can only look at you through the eyes of Christ, with the Grace He has given to me, and see who you are in HIM!!!

I love you and I forgive you - I know, you truly didn't know what you were doing - and because Christ has taken residency inside of me, Ich sage Dir, lieber Papa, steh auf und geh - Du bist Frei!!! Lebe das Leben, welches Du noch vor Dir hast im Frieden mit Gott und der Welt und Geniesse es. Du hast es Dir verdient!! Amen

Ich Liebe Dich,

Deine J├╝ngste,
Youschka

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